The English didn’t find it enough to troll us with the most linguistically nonsensical language possible, but they spread that throughout the earth, and are forcing this African to type using just that for you to understand this post. It turns out Shakespeare wasn’t the only one to make up words, “jus coz”… but it’s a thing these hacks did even with their town names.
Wikipedia
They forced Channel 4 News Weatherman, Liam Dutton to jump through this verbal hoop, watch him land like the top cat in the alley he is:
There are very few occasions weatherman deserve mic-drops… this is one of those. Reminds you of that moment you need to recall the State Fish of Hawaii don’t it?
It’s about TIME! Do you realize how many times I have heard you people speak and wanted to tear my hair out??? A lot, that’s how much! This is why I don’t have the dreadlocks I was destined to have.
{Ben’s Note: Woah, woah, woah! What the fuck do you mean “YOU PEOPLE”?}
Here’s a test. Read the following words out loud: “NIKE”… “AUNT”… “ZEBRA”. Easy, right?
If you’re one of these 3 people, you are “YOU PEOPLE”, and I hate you. Fix Yourself:
1. You read the sports apparel name as “ny-kee”. -_- Oh, you did? When did you learn to ride a “bi-kee”, huh? Think this will get a buncha “li-kees” when you share it with your dumb friends on facebook-ee? WELL, DO YA, PUNK-EE?
2. Your parent’s sister is actually a small disproportionately strong insect. She lives in an ant-hill, and serves the collective will of the colony. Why else would you pronounce her title like that? You should be pronouncing it like the delicious pastry “croissANT”. On another note, French is idiotic too. Way dumber. Let’s just surrender that battle of pronunciation and hope Americans have a plan to help.
3. Ever met a chick named Debra? I bet you did, and thought “I’ll have NO problem pronouncing THAT girl’s name. Debra… Debra Debra Debra Debraaaaa” Then, you were smacked in the head with a stupid stick, and when you saw this striped animal, your brain forgot how to pronounce her name, and that’s why you should thank my fellow South African, Trevor Noah for restoring your speech and pathology here:
Ben and Siya Blog Shit 