Watch Homeless Cristiano Ronaldo Show Us All How Petty We Are

On the streets of Madrid (it’s in SPAIN – GET A MAP), the most recognizable face in soccer got his Uncle Drew on and showed off his skills… but in disguise as a homeless dude. Known for slayin supermodels with a proficiency only rivaled by Hollyhood Superstar Leonardo DiCaprio, Cristiano usually has to fend off suitors. This time, watch what happens when he tries to get a girl’s number in character. Even better is the little fan’s reaction when he realizes…

U.S.A. Balled So Hard On Japan, Two World Cups Were Won!

Weekends don’t get much more American than the one we just had. Apart from celebrating kickin some red coat ass back in the day vis-a-vis 4th of July 1776, and the best “Dear King George John” letter.  In case you missed it, we recapped it for ya on our Instagram page – FOLLOW.

It’s okay if you’re a commie, but the rest of us in REAL America – went onto cheer on the U.S. Women’s National Team (featuring my inspiration, Christen Press) in the World Cup Final against Japan. By the 15th minute the ladies were up 3-0 in what proved to be too steep of a hole for Japan to climb back out of. So with a final score of 5-2, Japan was like “ugh, fine… U win”, which explains why I couldn’t get through to Christen Press’ phone as she was too busy instgrammin this:

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Congratulations for being part of that moment and cheering on you, red-blooded-American, you! What you might not have realized is, that was not the only world cup the U.S. beat Japan in that day…